Nursing Homes: Ethics Vs Logic & The Dilemma of a Harmonious Society
The old lady sat by the window continuously staring outside even though the blazing sun overhead made it a tough choice for her. For hours and hours, she would keep peeking out without uttering a single word. Was she looking at the trees? or the guards by the gate? or the stay dogs and cats? Only she knew. It had been three years since her beloved son had left her there. Three years since she had seen his face. Three kilometers away yet not a single contact in three years. The trauma had started off the trail of an incognizant disease that was making her forget things slowly. She remembered having a son but nothing else - not the sacrifices she had made for him when he was a kid, not the fights she had with him as he grew up, not even the happy moments they shared. Fortunately or unfortunately, neither did he seem to remember. Yet, the old lady, oblivious, kept looking towards the gate longingly for that son.
I heard someone say the other day — ‘Sending old people to old-age homes or nursing homes is a logical decision and not an ethical one’. I cringed hard hearing this. Logical counterarguments bombarded my mind yet I decided to let them pass. I was at a funeral and this was no time to bicker and debate about ethics and logic.
But I couldn’t keep mum for long. My mind won’t let me and so I decided to drop the discord in my mind on this page that you are now reading.
My first counter question to people who talk about nursing homes being logical for old people is — At what stage do you determine that old peeps in your house are good enough for nursing homes? Is it only after they become a burden because of the physical or mental conditions they have developed?
For those making this argument I ask again: How universal is this law?
God forbid, your healthy spouse or kid were to meet an accident and become handicapped for life — would you make the same logical decision of offloading your tasks? Find another spouse or leave the kids at an orphanage?
I might have poked some unconventional thoughts here but they are worth deliberating over. If these are the standards humanity is falling to then we might have a huge problem. A problem of humans acting in disharmony.
Climate Change is Real and Global Warming is Happening!
For a moment, let’s diverge. Let’s talk about the environment. Doesn’t that sub-heading above make sense? It’s been out for decades now. Environmentalists have been making sure this notion reaches every nook and corner of this planet. Why? Do we humans, not the harm we are causing to the environment? Are we so busy that we need someone to put a mirror in front of us to give us a reality check?
The answer to both of those questions is yes. But let’s dig further until we reach the root cause…
Is Nature lying to us about it? Nope.
Is it a problem of denial? No, we accept the fact that we are causing harm to nature.
Why are we not changing our way then? Because we have grown used to taking…
Aah! Now that’s where we have hit the bull’s eye. We are not changing our ways of looking at Nature because we have grown used to ONLY and ONLY taking from Nature and not GIVING BACK!
When we talk about nature, we talk about ecosystems and the life cycles of different life forms. Kids are taught about it in middle school and they forget about it as soon as they turn adults. No ecosystem can exist if individual organisms do not contribute or interact meaningfully.
Humans are part of the ecosystem too. Unfortunately, they have a hard time coming to terms with this one fact. Hence, the disharmony in the ecosystem and the consequent destruction of the environment and nature as we know it. Humans have forgotten to give back, just as much as they take from nature.
Things are improving here. Organizations and Industries are taking steps before it gets too late. But what does late even mean? It means accepting the fact that other planets cannot be our shelter after we are done destroying this planet. That Earth has to continue being our home eternally.
It means giving back to Nature. Living in harmony with it. Teaching future generations to take care of it. Leave this world better than it was. Creating a society that believes in this.
Back to Nursing Homes
Or maybe not going back to Nursing Homes. I found the root reason, as to why some think nursing homes are a logical decision rather than an ethical one, after thinking about environmental problems. After humans are done plundering nature, they want to exploit humans and human emotions — intentionally or unintentionally.
This means, once again, only taking and not giving back. We see our parents sacrifice so much as we grow up. Give us so much unconditional love. Then why does this love become conditional from our side — “As long as you are not a burden on me”? Ha! Ever heard of parents giving their infant kids up to an orphanage because they cry too much at night and load up their diapers real fast?
This is the thought I want to leave with you. People need to be more compassionate towards each other. They need to understand how to live in harmony — to give just as much as you receive. No questions asked. The debate about nursing homes should be an ethical one — just like caring for the environment is.
And maybe, just… maybe all those companies going Carbon-Nuetral now will be good examples for those building their careers and chasing materialistic pleasures by abandoning their responsibilities towards their aged family members.
Call it compassion or simply knowing how to live in harmony but remember: what goes around comes around. Whether it’s exploiting Mother Nature or your aged mother herself.
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